<p> Sadly, when many of the couples I counsel first enter my office, conflict is frequent and often volatile. Sometimes, the issues couples fight over are so minor that they can’t even remember the cause of the fight by the time they come to counseling. Still, the fighting is constant. They are asking, “Why do we fight and quarrel so much?”Fortunately, God foresaw that this would be a common problem, not just in marriage, but among</p>
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Have you ever been to someone’s home and from the minute you walk in you sense something is different. Our family went to visit some friends a while back and it made me rethink the meaning of fellowship and hospitality. This family was deeply interested in us and our every need as if they took hospitality as a matter of family pride. The grace and attention was almost embarrassing. They invited us beyond the dining room right into the living room for rich conversation
One day two parents bring a fragile soul to your office and tell you she has been caught cutting. They want you to help their daughter stop. But as you look at the daughter all you see is painful detachment. She has no real desire to stop cutting as long as the pain within haunts her soul and entices her to seek relief from a razor blade.
Websters defines waiting as the act of remaining inactive or stationary while looking forward to a future event. The free online dictionary defines waiting as remaining or resting in expectation. I remember reading a little story on my friend’s refrigerator when I was in high school. The gist of the story was that you
It was one of those moments you want to take back. It was one of those times when you go where your desires and emotions are leading you. It was one of those situations when you know you should stop or walk away but feel you can't. And it was one of those moments when afterward you are confronted with the sin that still lives inside of you. Yes, it was one of those moments.
Remember the story of the tortoise and the hare? As they started their infamous race, that rabbit had an unfair advantage. He was infinitely faster so the race was his to win! Maybe the tortoise felt fear? Or, maybe he resented the hare and resolved himself to failure. The hare bullied that tortoise with his verbal jabs and silent judgments. But, he got lazy. His pride and false sense of security led him to take what turned out to be a very unfortunate nap. He
I feel so sad. Many people I know feel desperate, confused, angry, depressed, and messed up. I hurt for them and want to help—don’t you? As Christian counselors, we are invited into someone’s broken heart and messed up life. They want hope that we have something unique to offer that will help them figure out what’s wrong so that they will feel better. But that’s the million dollar question isn’t it? What’s wrong? I’m afraid sometimes in my eagerness to be biblical, I’ve offered my counselee a biblical solution rather than God himself. I see this person before me as rebellious or undisciplined or indifferent to God’s Word and now the consequences of those lifestyle choices and/or emotional and thinking habits are bearing down on him or her in painful ways.
Note: Developed from Spiritual Friends. Spiritual Friends is part of the ABC’s biblical counseling curriculum and the ABC’s certification process. In Spiritual Friends you learn how to develop twenty-two biblical counseling relational competencies. This is the fifth in a ten-part ABC series. In this blog series, we’re learning five biblical counseling and one-another skills by using the acronym GRACE.
When our friend is hurting or struggling in life, how do we listen biblically? We can use the acrostic LISTEN to remind ourselves of basic components of competent biblical listening. L Loving Motivation: Proverbs 21:13 I Intimate Concern: Galatians 6:1-3; Colossians 4:6; James 3:17-18 S Slow to Speak: Proverbs 18:13; James 1:19 T Timing: Proverbs 15:23; 25:11
In the coming months, I am going to begin a series on what Psalm 107 has to say about prison ministry. In this first post, I will focus on the first two verses: 1Oh give thanks to the LORD, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever! 2Let the redeemed of the LORD say so, whom he has redeemed from trouble."